Thursday, July 31, 2008

this night's the perfect shade of...

Have officially replaced my love for boys who play guitar (swoon.) with boys who manage to play the piano without looking like Liberachi or Sir Elton John. Marry me, Andrew McMahon.

Tuesday, July 29, 2008


the earth quaked at 11.50something AM today.
magnitude: 5.8 (pretty fucking legit.)
damage: one sprained wrist, one broken crystal vase, various books and cds in disarray.

...and for the majority of the day i was concerened about the whereabouts of my silver tiffany's bracelet. the earthquake (we'll call it jeffrey. i've always thought it was a little unfair that hurricanes get names and earthquakes don't, so i've decided to name it instead.) anyway, earthquake jeffrey managed to make it disappear behind my dresser and it took the combined efforts of me and my siblings about an hour to find it. damn you, jeffrey.

Monday, July 28, 2008

confessions of a self proclaimed jet setter.

number of flights in the past calendar year: 17

number of destinations: 10

(one of these things is not like the other...)

things i've learned:

1. match all outfits to one (comfortable) pair of shoes.
2. take advantage of any and all free food...though i'll never eat another croissant ever again.
3. if you look pathetic at the airport people generally feel sorry for you. and their original suspicious ideas about your character seem to go away.
4. no matter what they tell you they could care less about liquids in your hand luggage. unless you're carrying $100 worth of lipgloss and the lady has been eye-ing the chanel one.
5. i spend far too much money on magazines.
6. people will never learn. and they will always be annoying. so stop expecting more.
7. sleeping pills are your best friend. really. i might be immune now...

things i'll never understand:

1. why i'm writing this in the margins of a sudoku book.
2. how i managed to buy a sudoku book in the first place
3. the last puzzle i couldn't finish :(
4. okay, enough.
5. children on leashes...isn't that illegal now?
6. why there's a small child sitting in front of me wearing a pirate costume. complete with hat, eye-patch and plastic sword. someone is lying to this child...i think it's the man sitting next to him named john.
7. people who ask for you window seat because they 'really want it.' I really want it too, that's why i requested it. christ.
8. the man sitting next to me is reading something that looks like a best seller, but I just saw the words 'prophet muhammad.' ummm when did they start making islamic fiction? and, better yet, why weren't his bags screened?

...I love traveling. I just really hate the process.

Sunday, July 20, 2008

worst european pick-up lines ever.

As followed:

'i'm not sure why, but my friend likes the looks of you...' the worst wingman ever.

'so this is a picture of my youngest son...' the 21 year old proceeded to tell me seconds after he sat down as he was showing me pictures on his phone.

'are you a person? no no you angel' fobtastic chinese man.

'yeeeeeeeeah americans!' annoying lacrosse playing tourists in dublin

'can i be your boyfriend?' drunk homeless man in cambridge.

so far my options are looking good.